I Think Blogging Is Magical!

I am here to confess that my youngest doesn’t know I blog or even what I blog about. Hence why I have decided that I must continue blogging. 

Yesterday after publicly releasing my blog about teenagers, my son brushed his teeth. The big deal about this is that he has autism and very serious sensory issues, yet he managed it! I gave little to no guidance because I didn’t want to discourage him. Proud mamma bear over here in this small spot in the web. Guess what else he did, without being asked or prompted, He took all the dirty dishes out of his room.

Another thing happened last night when I asked him to empty the dishwasher. He actually did it!! No arguments or nastiness, he just did it. Then, he asked if there was anything else I needed from him before he went back to his cave. HE LOOKED AT HIS CHORE CHART!! I said shower but I guess that's pushing it. Tomorrow is another day.

Anyways, back to my original point, there might be something to this whole writing things down that seems to magically make the boy do things! Maybe I am jumping too fast but it is worth a shot since I am still the lost mom that feels stuck.

Teenagers....The Unspoken Truth

Children, aren’t they adorable? They steal our hearts and are perfect at everything, in our eyes. We know that we can mold these children to be respectful and responsible. But my how fast they grow. My oldest child is a young adult but the other three are teenagers. I feel like I woke up to a different child. I know, I should be a pro with four children. The girls are either through or almost through the teenage stage. BOYS!!! It's like an alien took over their brains.

Suddenly their body emits an awful smell and water might make them melt. I am serious, even mentioning taking a shower sets him off. The new attitude that he uses now is appalling. Some might assume the child was raised by the wolves. I swear he wasn't. It’s all about the video games or the newest Tik Tok that came out. The room that used to be kept clean, is now an obstacle course. I was wondering where all my dishes went and why I didn’t see much in his laundry basket. Wonder no more, enter at your own risk. They are in the teenagers room; Somewhere...

What happened to the years I spent understanding this human, teaching this human? I put a chore chart up again, he never even gives it a glance. It has become wall art now. I have even found myself adding chores like “Brush your hair”, and “Put deodorant on”, just to ensure his hygiene doesn’t get forgotten amidst the games he wishes to play. Just to clarify, that did not work either.

I need some ideas, thoughts, and answers. I feel like I am stuck in a teenage trap. Someone grab onto me and pull me out! Would love some feedback from you all and feel free to share this with other moms of teens cause this mom is seriously stuck.

YOU JUST CAN’T MAKE THIS SH*T UP! pt. 1

I hemmed and hawed over the title for this post...  "Mommy mess ups", “What not to do”, "Not the babysitter " I went with this, I impress myself sometimes. I will unleash all my long hidden “mistakes”. The cringe moments of parenting without a manual. The things we don't talk about and some things that we do. I guess we should start at the beginning, my first born. When most babies are born most moms, especially first time moms, look at every inch of their baby, counting fingers and toes. I had my firstborn when I was nineteen. I had a traumatic birth as she was born breach. I argued with every doctor that I was having a natural birth with no pain meds. So...that is exactly what I got. Mistake 1, no pain meds. She was perfect, I didn't count fingers and toes. The doctors and nurses do that right? Mistake 2, never assume. In my defense they put those mittens on them, so you can't see right away. 😲 I didn't notice until she came home and I took the mitts off. Wham.. She had conjoined fingers. She was still perfect though.
Mommy blunder #1: Count those fingers and toes. 
I have so much more to share so till next time, Chow

Lost Identity

Anybody else lost their identity since motherhood? I am a mom, first and foremost but I am so much more as well. I need some help because my name has now disappeared and become Krystal, Jocelyn, Jacob and Charlie's mom!  I think by the time I have wandered into the years of freedom again not only will I not understand the concept of drinking hot coffee but I may not even remember my name. 
It is either I am related to as someone's mother or the mother with a child on the spectrum. I can see it now, I am 50 yrs old and I walk into the restaurant I have always dined at and the waiter says,"Hi Charlie's mom I will seat you now."  LOL...  I was almost mortified when I went to a parent teacher meeting and not once did she address me by my name. It was,"Hi, You must be Krystal's mom. She is such a sweet young lady.", and ending the meeting with,"It was a pleasure to meet you Krystal's mom." Where did I go?  At one point I even told my children they could call me by my given name in hopes to protect my identity. But then, I found them using it when they were mad and saying, No Charlene I don't want to. That stopped quickly and again I was thrown into the crisis of a multiple personality disorder gone wrong. 
The person I was born as has slowly disappeared. I don't even know what to do with myself when I don't have children in tow. Now, this does not happen often, yet this weekend I found myself playing Mario just to have some normal in my life. Scary, I know. I even went into my son's bedroom to "check" on him, but the problem is he wasn't home. I am determined to find Charlene and if you see her can you tell her I am looking for her? You can refer to me as MOM or advocate, or well anything that pertains to the children in my life. Now I am not complaining but this double life is taking a toll on me as I seem to have lost my double, and I can't find it. 
Does anyone know how I might regain my identity? Can we actually lead a double life, or should I adjust to this change of name? My identity remains lost in the mist of motherhood. Does yours?